I’ve been back home living with my parents for about 10 months now, so almost a year. While it’s nice to be back around my family and not being limited to seeing them like a once month, there are some drawbacks. One of them is the things you start to realize you can’t do anymore or that you don’t have control over because it’s not your house or space.
I am a mixture of independent and dependent. There are certain things that without someone around to remind me or force me to do, wouldn’t get done. Things like scheduling doctor’s appointments, going to Secretary of State before my license expires, having my car looked at, etc. However, I’m not someone who wants someone else to have a say or control over my life or decisions. Even though I like getting other peoples opinions and advice I don’t want to ever feel like i have to take it. I also really need my personal space. While I have never, so far had a place of my own, I’ve at least come close. I mean there’s a big difference between living with your family and living with a friend in an apartment or sharing a dorm room in college.
Anyway, here are some of things that I had taken for granted and now have to learn to deal without.
- Grocery Space: When I was living in a one bedroom apartment with a college colleague after graduation it was, obviously, just the two of us. We bought our own groceries and we only had to worry about each other using the space. At my parent’s house, the fridge is housing groceries for the whole family and my dad caters so when he has an event the fridge and freezer are stuffed to the max. The problem I have is that even on days where I kind of feel like picking up some of my own groceries, I can’t always because the fridge is full of stuff I can’t eat. Thankfully my parents are fine with feeding me and my mom, when she can, will sometimes pick me up some gluten free food, but you know there are just days were I wish I could go and buy a bunch of stuff that I wanted. You know?
- Privacy: This is a big one. It probably wouldn’t be that big a deal if i had a real room. My room is just a slightly sectioned off space in our upstairs. In a way I share a room with my little sister but her section is kind of in a little alcove but there are no doors. The only part of the upstairs that has a door is the bathroom and my parent’s room. This makes privacy very difficult.
- Clothes: I will be very upfront and say that whenever I had my previous homes to myself, because my roommates were gone, I would walk around in whatever I wanted. Whether that was just a long shirt and nothing else, just my undergarments, or whatever. But that’s kind of hard to do now, and I feel weird doing it even when I’m the only one home.
- Personal Space: This is kind of in line with the privacy thing, the only difference being that even if I had a room to myself it wouldn’t necessarily fix the personal space issue. I am very protective of my bubble. I don’t like people invading my space, I don’t like people touching me, I don’t like being interrupted when I’m in the middle of something, and all of these things happen a lot at home. They happen elsewhere too, but home should be the one place it doesn’t.
- Bed Time: I am a night owl. Always have been and always will be. I like staying up late, that’s usually when I feel inspired and get the most done. However, the problem is that since my room is right next to my sister’s and we don’t have doors, I feel bad staying up late because I don’t want to disturb her. Plus it’s just difficult because I have to do things without a light, or feel like I have to be super quiet, and it just hampers my style.
- Music: I like blaring my music. Whether it’s in the car, my room or just the house period. I especially like doing this when I’m doing chores. Problem is my parents aren’t a huge fan of that and they don’t really approve of my music choices so I can’t really blare it through the house when they’re around.
I really don’t mean to complain, that’s not my purpose. I knew when I moved back home that I would be giving up certain comforts, it’s just tough sometimes.